The Walk

As I stepped outside, I was greeted by the brisk morning air. Leash in hand, my dog and I proceeded on our typical morning walk. But something caught my attention. Something seemed….off. Not right. Was it that it was quite a bit earlier in the morning than we normally ventured out? No, thats not it. Although, it did feel odd to be awake and out of bed before noon. It was something else. We crossed the street and pressed on. Several strides down the damp sidewalk, the realization struck me. There was an unusual calmness about the neighborhood. It was the lack of sound that was unnerving, the absence of the ordinary hustle and bustle of daily life. The dog and I, both skeptical and uneasy, decided to continue on our journey. The dog sauntered in front of me, occasionally stopping to sniff a piece of grass here, then tottered over to another patch of grass there. Searching for the perfect place to go potty was her mission. Mine was staying vigilant. Our lives depended on it. 

The dog was being particularly fussy in finding a place to do her business. As she searched for the perfect place to leave her mark, I continued to survey the peculiarity of the situation. It wasn't until the dog found the perfect tree to mark, that I noticed that in addition to the absence of life being lived, there were no cars on the street. None. No cars parked in the driveways that lined the street, nor were there any driving down the streets. This raised my concern and I looked at things more critically. No cars on this street, none on the busy road just across the block, and not a breath of sound or wind. I began to wonder if this was death. Maybe I had died in the night. That would explain why I was awake at this ungodly hour. I pinched myself. Nope, that hurt. Not dead. My next thought was that perhaps everyone else was dead. And then I remembered. The Walking Dead. This is what it was like in the zombie apocalypse. Everyone else was dead. I was sure of it…. but they weren't really dead. They were out there somewhere…. searching for me. And my delicious body. 

I quietly urged the dog to hurry up and poop so that we could make a dash to the safety of the house, which was now several blocks away. I realized that if I had to run, I would not make it. I'm too fat for this. If the walkers got me, I would provide a luscious all you can eat buffet. Again, the dog was being picky. I begged her to poop. She looked up at me with her big brown puppy dog eyes that seemed to say, "Fuck you, lady". I began to calmly head back to the house. All of my begging and pleading must have agreed with the dog's anus because she decided to delay our escape to safety by pooping on a nearby stretch of grass. As she squatted, she again looked up at me with those condescending eyes. I swear it was the longest time she has ever taken to poop. After what seemed like hours, she got up and gave me the "I'm ready" look. I swiftly pulled out the plastic baggy and scooped up the poop. Even in a zombie apocalypse I couldn't justify just leaving her poop. Seriously people, clean up after your dogs. I don't wanna step in a huge steaming pile of shit when I'm speed walking away from a walker. 

As I got to the garage, I furiously typed in the code. I must have been distracted by the sudden noise down the street that I punched in the wrong number. What was that noise? A dog barking? Oh no! He was trying to send up a warning. They're coming. I had to get us to safety. I turned back to the key pad and frantically entered the numbers. One by one. I pressed enter and the door began to rise. The door clumsily and loudly opened. Damn it, I should have gotten that fixed! They heard me for sure. I knew there was no way they didn't hear that open. I pulled the dog into the house, closed the garage door, and finally felt a sense of safety. Something I hadn't felt since I stepped outside the door that morning. I cautiously made my way to the window, not wanting to make myself known to any walker that may be lurking. And that's when I saw it. It was my neighbor down the block. I gasped in horror when I saw the terrible, gruesome sight. Her dog had just taken a huge dump and she didn't clean it up. I stood at my window watching the gag inducing site. I couldn't look away. I stood there, watching, as she briskly walked down the street, enjoying her walk. That's when I realized the truth of the matter. It wasn't the zombie apocalypse. I had just watched too many episodes of The Walking Dead. No, people weren't dead. Just common courtesy and common sense. The most frightening truth of all. What is the cure for that? No one knows…. and that's the scariest part. 

Life Goes On

Wow, I can't believe it has been years since I've written anything on this blog. A lot has changed in my life. Hell, these past few years I have continued to grown into the real me. 

Writing has always been a cathartic outlet for me. It is a way for me to lay out my feelings, evaluate things, and helps put things into perspective. Why did I stop writing in this blog? Life, I guess. Tends to get away from you, you fall away from passions, but the important thing is reconnecting with those passions. Another passion of mine is making people laugh. I used to be able to combine the two passions. At least, I think I did. A few people told me they always got a kick out of my writing. So, I guess, in a way, this is me jumping back into the saddle. 

I've changed in the last few years, been through some pretty rough times, had a few laughs, but also some moments that I never thought I'd see. The old me was always going on and on about finding love. So? Did it happen yet? I'm pretty sure it did. One thing I've come to accept in this life is something my grandpa used to say- "Man plans and God laughs". If I've learned anything, its that you can plan life all you want, but it will never go just how you've planned. I had this time life for my life. When and how I'd meet someone, when we'd get married, have kids, and ride off into the sunset. Well, I'm pretty sure God laughed his ass off when he saw my plan. Nothing has gone according to plan in my life, not sure why I keep planning….

So back to the love thing. Back in October of 2013, someone very special to me came into my life. Since then, I've been head over heels. I finally found someone who appreciates my quirky-ness, matches my sense of humor, and forces me out of my comfort zone. Laughter has always been a huge part of my life and I knew that I needed to find someone who valued that trait as much as I do. I am able to confidently say that he most certainly makes me laugh… even on the days I don't feel much like laughing. He has been there with me through some very difficult times and can't thank him enough for that. I can only hope that I have provided that same strength, love, and courage that he has given to me. 

I have reached a point in my life where I have chosen happiness. I've seen and felt the deepest, darkest depths of depression and I don't intend on going back. Now that I've found my happy place, I'm holding on for dear life and I won't let anyone stand in front of my happiness. You can have your opinions about my life and choices, but I'm the one who has to live with them…. not you. I let other people's opinions about me run my life for far too long, and living a free life has made me a way happier person. Also, remember that plan I was talking about? Yeah, I've thrown that out and am just living life. What ever is meant to happen, will happen when it's meant to. My boyfriend has taught me that. Spontaneity is the spice of life, and I have a partner who reminds me of that everyday. To answer your question- Yes, I found my true love.